F TROOP Fridays: "The Great Troop Robbery" (1966)

F TROOP Fridays - Number 43

F TROOP:  "The Great Troop Robbery" (ABC-TV/Warner Brothers 1966) Season Two, Episode 39.  Original Air Date: October 6, 1966.  Starring Forrest Tucker as Sergeant Morgan O'Rourke, Larry Storch as Corporal Randolph Agarn, Ken Berry as Captain Wilton Parmenter, Melody Patterson as Wrangler Jane, Frank deKova as Chief Wild Eagle, Don Diamond as Crazy Cat, James Hampton as Bugler Dobbs, Bob Steele as Duffy, Joe Brooks as Vanderbilt, Ivan Bell as Dudleson.  Special Guest Star Milton Berle as Wise Owl.  Written by Stan Burns and Mike Marmer.  Directed by Seymour Robbie.

Talk about a con man getting conned.  Corporal Agarn has purchased Thunder the Wonder Horse from a traveling medicine show.  Dubbed "the smartest horse in the West", Thunder doesn't live up to his billing when attempting to dance or count, but when Agarn channels his inner Evel Knievel, Thunder is smart enough to pull up before jumping a hitching rail.  Unfortunately our Corporal kept going, and ended up concussed and confused as a result.

"THAT'S the smartest horse in the West?"

Post-injury Agarn is behaving strangely: much more astute in his judgement despite misremembering his name and O'Rourke's among a number of memory lapses.  One might consider this a positive side effect, but then the entire troop is robbed of money and belongings and Randolph's strange behavior and close proximity makes him the primary suspect.  Crazy Cat and Dobbs are also under suspicion, and the troop turns to the new Hekawi medicine man Wise Owl to investigate.

"He go from tribe to tribe--has couch, will travel!"

Milton Berle guest starring on F TROOP.  This was apparently after the showdown with Tuck that has only become more legendary over the years, so I can only imagine what locker room talk on the set was like.  While we viewers can't be privy to that, we do get a heaping helping of witty onscreen dialogue from Burns and Marmer (Too Many Cooks Spoil the Troop).  A lot is generously thrown Berle's way, he gets all the usual wisdom (see below) and Chief Wild Eagle deferentially vouches for the traveling psychologist/detective/medicine man.  Spoiler alert!--Wild Eagle's endorsement ultimately proves to be a rare lapse in his judgement for the usually savvy Hekawi leader.  I can say rare, but not unprecedented (Honest Injun).

"For confession, getting there is half the fun!"

It isn't just the Chief showing very special respect to our guest.  After Wild Eagle's endorsement, O'Rourke hires Wise Owl to identify the thief and recover the stolen property for $2 hourly.  The Captain is also taken in, putting his savings at risk to trap the guilty party and even giving the Wise one use of his office!   One has to wonder why such a revered shrink and investigator feels the need to put that seemingly thriving business reputation in jeopardy by theft--maybe he just can't control his kleptomania?  

"Vanderbilt isn't aiming at us, Sergeant."

"I know that.  If he was I wouldn't be worried!" 

As was the case in their previous entry, Burns and Marmer give our secondary characters a little extra love.  Vandy hilariously guards the barracks after everything has been stolen, and suspects Dobbs and Crazy Cat get more time in the spotlight than usual, albeit via the Wise One's rather brutal interrogation methods.  The anticipated sly satirization of absolute power and its abuse is followed by the first limits to that hastily granted power--Wise Owl has Parmenter and Wild Eagle pulling their respective manuals out.  While Dobbs and Agarn both face blazing heat in his efforts to draw an admission, Crazy Cat probably endures the cruelest questioning.

Berle doesn't disappoint with the wide berth he's given.  He's nowhere near as hammy as Rickles nor as imposing as Korman, contributing mightily to this most vaudevillian of F TROOPs.  A thoroughly appropriate assignment for the writers, who were on the staff of Berle's 1966 series comeback (that lasted only a week into 1967 on ABC) and later worked together on practically every successful variety show of the late 1960's and 1970's (i.e. DEAN MARTIN, FLIP WILSON).  This was their second and last F TROOP, with both their freelance scripts proving to be winners.  

"Not think Crazy Cat type to steal."

While Wild Eagle originally outs Crazy Cat's wampum problems at home, it is heartening to see that when the chips are down the Chief gives Crazy Cat the grace that his assistant rarely (re: never) gives him.  O'Rourke casually throws Dobbs into harm's way in an effort to deflect suspicion from his amnestic V.P., but to be fair the Sarge knows the Captain will protect his orderly.  As always, keeping business running smoothly probably motivates our Enterprisers more than altruism, and con man Wise Owl cannily plays them against one another to divert all eyes away from him.  His eventual slip of the tongue is abrupt and obvious, but doesn't detract from an otherwise really good (if not transcendently so) time.

Oh, and there's a cute almost-reference to Wise Owl's Medicine Man predecessor from the first season, but apparently the inventor of the RoarChick test (ha!) is in fact a different guy actually named Roar Chick and not this elder statesman seen standing behind Wild Eagle:

HOW'S BUSINESS AT O'ROURKE ENTERPRISES?

None of the thefts were a direct hit, but one can assume that the troopers being short of funds can't be a good thing for the saloon.

HEKAWI WISDOM?

How enthusiastically did they roll out the red carpet for Mr. Television?  He gets three aphorisms to the Chief's zero!  The first two:  "When fox look at sky, Easter get bitten on kneecap by toothless rabbit."  The second makes a little more sense, though it provokes one of Tucker's greatest reactions of the series: "Sometimes not wise to be wise--more wise to be unwise!'  

BAITING THE CENSORS?

Which brings us to our third Wise Old saying: "When shadow of wet bird fall on crooked log, time out for beaver."  Followed by Wise Owl abruptly ending his session with Agarn after seeing this P.O.V.: 

Wise Owl looks ready to walk over to her as the camera leaves.  Mmm hmmm....

PC, OR NOT PC?

Any lechery that followed that was kept offscreen, and Wise Owl gives some equal time to the traveling medicine show after paleface Professor Cornelius Clyde hoodwinked Wild Eagle and most of the troop in season one.  As noted above, the white men are just as deferential to all knowing Wise Owl as the natives, and he's no noble Native, already absolutely corrupted before getting absolute power over the investigation.  He's just as tyrannical to his own as the white suspects if not even more so.  Takes a while for O'Rourke to catch on to him, but to be fair the threat of losing his Vice President was more than a little distracting.  

THE ALL IMPORTANT NIELSENS:

Uncle Miltie's appearance probably didn't hurt, but the bigger factor in the highest Thursday rating to date (18.8 rating, 33.2 share) was likely lead-out TAMMY GRIMES (9.9!) getting replaced at 8:30 P.M. by THE DATING GAME (16.6).  Berle was returning a favor, as Storch and Tucker had appeared on Berle's new series the previous Friday.  Unfortunately they couldn't dislodge many viewers from MY GEISHA or THE MAN FROM U.N.C.L.E. and Berle was a poor third in the time slot yet again with a 12.0/21.8 share.  However, BERLE saw a spike the night after his F TROOP with a 13.8/25.3.  

THE BOTTOM LINE:

With its venerable guest star who is forever linked with Tucker in Hollywood lore The Great Troop Robbery can't help but be one of the most famous F TROOP installments.  Loads of fun but not quite as inspired as the business agreement that kick-starts the previous Burns/Marmer entry.  Despite the thin plot and fairly obvious guilty party, a good job from Berle makes this sitcom's inevitable amnesia plot highly enjoyable despite its slightness.  Originally rated it a half star higher; it's really close.  (*** out of four)

F TROOP Fridays: "How to be F Troop Without Really Trying" (1966)

 

F TROOP Fridays: Number 41 

F TROOP: "How to be F Troop Without Really Trying" (ABC-TV/Warner Brothers 1966)  Season Two, Episode 2; Original Air Date: September 15, 1966.  Starring Forrest Tucker as Sergeant Morgan O'Rourke, Larry Storch as Corporal Randolph Agarn, Ken Berry as Captain Wilton Parmenter, Melody Patterson as Wrangler Jane, Frank deKova as Chief Wild Eagle, Don Diamond as Crazy Cat, James Hampton as Bugler Hannibal Dobbs, Bob Steele as Duffy, Joe Brooks as Vanderbilt.  Guest Stars: George Tyne as Major Bradley and Les Brown Jr. as Lieutenant Harrison.  Written by Arthur Julian.  Directed by David Alexander.

Major Bradley is the latest visiting officer to ride into Fort Courage.  Inspection?  Hardly. F Troop has been ordered to train their own replacements, G Troop.  The entire squad is being transferred to Bloody Creek, with the exception of one N.C.O. who will remain: Corporal Randolph Agarn.  

This news is poorly received by all: Agarn doesn't want to be left with a bunch of strangers, Jane and Wilton don't want to be separated by distance, and O'Rourke surely doesn't want to be away from his lucrative side hustle (though, unbelievably, this isn't even brought up until Act II).  An order is an order, however, and this is one time Uncle Sam seemingly won't be deterred by any shenanigans.

After The Singing Mountie opened F TROOP's sophomore season with a bang, the second color entry is a huge letdown.  The weakest of the 36 segments to date, How to be F Troop Without Really Trying is almost completely incongruous with everything that preceded it--surprising since it was written by the most prolific of the show's writers, Arthur Julian.  The single biggest issue is the complete impotence of Sergeant O'Rourke, heretofore the man who ruled while Parmenter reigned.  

More fun than the audience is having, that's for sure

Much like Bilko at Fort Baxter a century after him, O'Rourke was the real mover and shaker at Fort Courage.  When we met him in Scourge of the West, he'd already eliminated two Captains and a Major before Parmenter arrived (two desertions, one nervous breakdown) and gave him his "Great White Pidgeon"--the perfect C.O. for O'Rourke Enterprises.  Presidency of that Enterprises paid well enough that a General's pay would be a salary reduction, and threats to the Sarge's business were eliminated one by one--be they from a quartet of visiting Majors (including one from the Bengal Lancers!) or from empowered members of Parmenter's esteemed military family.  He might be temporarily bowed by each obstacle presented, but O'Rourke was never surrendering his highly profitable side hustle meekly.  

That Sergeant O'Rourke is missing entirely from How to be F Troop Without Really Trying.  Previously defending his Enterprises at all costs, he's oddly submissive to this order, deferring to Wilton's formal protest via official channels.  The helplessness might be understandable, but not the apathy.  The Sarge weirdly seems more concerned with the potential breakup of Jane and Wilton than with the loss of his own business until the literal day before the move, when he suddenly realizes he has one.  Even then we get no real subterfuge from the NCO's or their partners, just a toothless threat from Wild Eagle to break the treaty which goes nowhere.  A man willing to sabotage military strategy (to the point of letting the Hekawi take over Fort Courage once!) and even risk being burned at the stake to save his beloved establishment is now ungrudgingly handing the reigns to Agarn and becoming a soldier again.  Hey...who are you, and what have you done with Morgan O'Rourke?

The impression given is that working on Major Bradley is completely useless against this bureaucratic order--one somehow superior to all the others previously faced.  Why then, is it so abruptly overturned by a few seconds of post-Parmenter ineptitude (no worse than anything we've seen previously) by....Major Bradley?  And Sarge does nothing to facilitate the eventual fatal flaw---that incompetent F Troop would produce trainees just as hopeless.  He's already ridden off to Bloody Creek, when in fact this Achilles heel should have been one of O'Rourke's first thoughts, since this was his initial counter to the threat Bentley Royce posed in the aforementioned Phantom Major.  

As for the Vice President, Corporal Agarn's response also lacks his previous greed and ambition.  Before now (Play, Gypsy, Play and Lt. O'Rourke, Front and Center) eager to prove he could provide the brains of the organization just as well as the Sarge, Agarn is also a changed man for the worse.  Yeah, he's always been gentler than O'Rourke, but never to the point of having no heart whatsoever for even keeping the Enterprises going without him.  He's always been a weeper, but an avaricious one.  Until now, that is.  

"I was told you even smoked the peace pipe."

"I didn't inhale!"

With complete changes in our characters that normally would never be found outside of a dream sequence, there's little to recommend about How to be F Troop Without Really Trying.  It is historically significant for the above line, a quarter century before Bill Clinton famously used it, and also as the very first example of the "Who says I'm dumb?" exchange that would rival the falling lookout tower as F TROOP's signature running gag.  The rest of the time, this slow moving plot give us lots of ineptitude-fueled slapstick and sappy sentimentality failing to bolster Julian's still-solid wordplay.  Fortunately, O'Rourke and Agarn would return to being their normal materialistic selves in subsequent weeks, thankfully making this dire affair an outlier.  

HOW'S BUSINESS AT O'ROURKE ENTERPRISES?

About to go bankrupt without a whimper, apparently.  We never even visit the saloon and it is as if it doesn't even exist this week.  Strangely, O'Rourke has all that merchandise surrounding him while he sits in the NCO Club while he worries about the fate of the Wilton/Jane romance.  Yes, really.

NUMBER OF TIMES O'ROURKE COULD HAVE BEEN TRIED FOR TREASON?

He did consort with the enemy when he advised the Chief to threaten to break the treaty.  That's still a far cry from actually throwing battles or paying for easily repelled attacks, though, and not nearly as much fun.

WISE OLD HEKAWI SAYING?

Not much wisdom from anyone young or old in this.  Parmenter had a long-winded quote from his father that defended seemingly unjust Army orders, but extra verbiage didn't equal extra wisdom or humor.  

HISTORICAL FACTS:

Agarn asks Duffy to send him a letter Pony Express about his Alamo exploits, with the Private reminding him that it stopped running five years ago.  ("I know that Duffy.")  It did in fact cease operations in October 1861, so apparently How to be F Troop Without Really Trying takes place exactly one century prior to its September 1966 air date.

THE BOTTOM LINE:

The worst installment to date by far and arguably the worst of the entire series.  Other segments that didn't get the show's characters right were usually done by freelancers or first time F TROOP scripters. Writing his 15th episode here, Arthur Julian has no such excuse.  Fortunately, this was not indicative of a new direction.  Sandwiched between The Singing Mountie and Bye, Bye Balloon, How to be F Troop without Really Trying is an isolated dud best skipped over while you are binging IMO.  (1/2 star out of ****)

F TROOP is currently airing weekdays at 9 a.m. Eastern on THE OUTLAW NETWORK. 

F TROOP Fridays: "The West Goes Ghost" (1966)

 

F TROOP Fridays -- Number 40 

F TROOP: "The West Goes Ghost" (1966 Warner Brothers/ABC-TV) Season Two, Episode 40: Original Air Date October 13, 1966.  Starring Forrest Tucker as Sgt. Morgan O'Rourke, Larry Storch as Corporal Randolph Agarn, Ken Berry as Captain Wilton Parmenter, Melody Patterson as Wrangler Jane, Frank deKova as Chief Wild Eagle, James Hampton as Bugler Hannibal Dobbs, Joe Brooks as Private Vanderbilt, Bob Steele as Trooper Duffy, Ivan Bell as Dudleson, Don Diamond as Crazy Cat.  Guest Star Don Beddoe as Harry The Hermit.  Written by Arthur Julian.  Directed by Seymour Robbie.

Sergeant O'Rourke's latest scheme is arguably his biggest ever, big enough to need two new partners (Dobbs and Vanderbilt): homesteading Paradise Junction, a nearby ghost town.  O'Rourke has inside information that the railroad will soon be passing through Paradise, and the Sarge feels the upside is high enough for the men to legally buy their way out of the army.  It isn't the easiest sale to Agarn, but the two men who aren't benefitting from being Vice President of O'Rourke Enterprises already are ready to try it, and the Corporal follows suit.

"We can make a fortune here!"

"Selling dust?"

It's easy to see holes in the plan right away: Dobbs and Agarn will be the town dentist and doctor, respectively (that's what medical books are for, right?).  "Man of Vision" Vanderbilt will run the hotel while O'Rourke runs the bank.  Doctor Agarn is the largest obstacle once he's clued in by Jane and Wild Eagle that Paradise has literal ghosts roaming the grounds--those of Black Jack Crawford and Maud Fletcher.

As was the case in Captain Parmenter, One Man Army, O'Rourke decides to take his Enterprises into the civilian world.  That was planned as a temporary side hustle, though--this time it's for keeps, with O'Rourke citing the Homestead Act (1862, one would assume) and planning to leave Army life for good.  Attracting people to the abandoned former Paradise hinges solely on the Sarge's inside information on the railroad and it isn't much of a spoiler to reveal that the scuttlebutt has it wrong.

"If we believe in happy hunting ground in the sky, how tough is it to believe in ghosts?"

The President of O'Rourke Enterprises also had much more enthusiastic support from his regular partners in the previous season's venture.  Wild Eagle has zero interest, though it appears his aversion is to offering whiskey on credit rather than the rumored apparitions.  Since there are no residents in Paradise Junction yet, one must assume O'Rourke needs the red-eye advance for the regular saloon while he meets the financial requirements for the application.

"Are you sure Millard Fillmore ain't President?"

Unsuccessful at bringing life to the deserted Junction, O'Rourke does manage to solve the mystery of Blackjack Crawford: he's Harry the Hermit, who seems to be a big reason the town has no other residents.  Not that he needs to scare them away, as he seems more than capable of annoying anyone away who comes near in our few minutes with him.  Delightfully grungy here, ubiquitous character actor Don Beddoe's more than 300 credits included UNHOLY PARTNERS, the MAVERICK episode Rope of Cards, and HONOLULU LU and HOODLUM EMPIRE with Tucker.

With a pencil thin story to hang everything on and a punch line delivered long before the end, the key point of interest for The West Goes Ghost is seeing so many secondary characters in different duds.  Vanderbilt gets more to do than usual (though the "sight" gags are never far away); Dobbs is the nominal adult in the room as his running season two rivalry with Agarn picks up steam; O'Rourke and Agarn's suits from One Man Army look funnier in color (particularly the latter); but Duffy's promotion all the way to three stripes after over thirty years of service seems like it should be a bigger event.  Predictably, the new Sergeant's role model remains Davy Crockett. 

After Agarn's disastrous kitchen foray in Too Many Cooks Spoil the Troop O'Rourke doesn't take any chances--Dobbs handles the cooking in Paradise.  There's a great foreshadowing in-joke after the Bugler names the ingredients of his Louisiana roots-driven dinner: wild rabbit stew, corn fritters, mustard greens and black-eyed peas.  O'Rourke responds by quoting the signature song of Tucker's childhood hero Phil Harris: "and that's what I like about the South!"  Harris was three months away from memorably guest starring in What Are You Doing After the Massacre?  

NUMBER OF TIMES O'ROURKE COULD HAVE BEEN TRIED FOR TREASON:

None; can't commit many military crimes when you're not in the service for ninety percent of the episode.

NAGGING QUESTIONS:

Lots.  Why doesn't Captain Parmenter just show O'Rourke the letter requesting a railroad protection detail--proof that Paradise is being bypassed--instead of the elaborate ruse with Jane?  Why doesn't Harry the Hermit stake a claim to the town, since he claims to have lived there 20 years?  And why is Harry so quick to leave when he feels he has ghostly competition, since two decades seems like a Hell of a commitment to abandon in five seconds?

PROMOTIONS:

In Lt. O'Rourke, Front and Center the Sergeant's temporary commission resulted in equally temporary promotions to Sergeant (Agarn), Corporal (Dobbs), and Bugler (Hoffenmueller).  Agarn and Dobbs join this venture, leaving F Troop with a distressingly thin bench.  Duffy goes from zero stripes all the way to three, and Dudleson gets the bugler nod (he isn't really a downgrade, IMO).  But apparently no one left can fill Agarn's shoes, since there's no temporary Corporal.  Interestingly, the new cannon crew is able to miss the lookout tower, but unable to avoid hitting Jane's general store and the customers in it.

HOW'S BUSINESS AT O'ROURKE ENTERPRISES?

While the Paradise Junction venture yields no profits, one would hope he isn't out the cost of the homestead application yet and that he and the men get their buyouts back after the quick reenlistment.

WISE OLD HEKAWI SAYING?

Some wisdom regarding lending and the aforementioned quote on superstitions, but no literal saying this time.

PC OR NOT PC?

A stereotype is only being played up as an excuse.  Wild Eagle isn't really afraid of ghosts, just of extending credit.  Considering the success of the venture, he's proven right. 

THE BOTTOM LINE:

The West Goes Ghost goes down easy enough during its inevitable journey back to the status quo.  Some good lines by Julian and a rare chance to see everyone either out of uniform or in different positions but this one is awfully slight and seems padded well before the end of Act II.  An average entry at best.  Every Sixties sitcom needed a haunted house or town at least once and F TROOP did their comedy of horrors better with V is for Vampire later in the season.  (**1/2 out of four)  

F TROOP airs at 9 A.M. to 11 A.M. Eastern Time weekdays on The Outlaw Network.

F TROOP Fridays: "Reunion for O'Rourke" (1966)

 F TROOP Fridays: Number 39   

F TROOP: "Reunion for O'Rourke" (1966 ABC-TV/Warner Brothers) Season One, Episode 25; Original Air Date March 8, 1966.  Starring Forrest Tucker as Sergeant Morgan O'Rourke, Larry Storch as Corporal Randolph Agarn, Ken Berry as Captain Wilton Parmenter, Melody Patterson as Wrangler Jane, Frank de Kova as Chief Wild Eagle, James Hampton as Private Dobbs, Bob Steele as Private Duffy, Joe Brooks as Private Vanderbilt, Ivan Bell as Private Dudleson.  Guest stars: Eve McVeagh as Wilma McGee, Ben Gage as Mike O'Hanlon, Marjorie Bennett as Ella Vorhees, Richard Reeves as Jim Sweeney.  Written by Ed James and Seaman Jacobs.  Directed by Charles Rondeau.

"Many years ago, tribe leave Massachusetts because pilgrims ruin neighborhood...."

Sergeant Morgan Sylvester O'Rourke lets slip to the Captain that he is celebrating his 25th anniversary in the service this month, but his accompanying furlough request is motivated by business rather than nostalgia: namely, a surplus of souvenirs needing a buyer.  Unfortunately, an elevated threat of Indian uprisings has by-the-book Captain Parmenter denying O'Rourke's reasonable request.

The threat of losing his share of the profits has Agarn off to persuade Parmenter but the Captain coaxes the Corporal with an idea of his own: a surprise testimonial dinner.  As planned by the C.O. the secret celebration will make travel unnecessary by bringing the Sergeant's oldest and dearest friends to Fort Courage for the occasion.  Yes, Agarn puts sentiment ahead of profit once the Captain puts him in charge of the entire affair.  But as demonstrated in Play, Gypsy, Play the previous week, there's good reason not to have him in the driver's seat.

"We have lined up the finest entertainment west of.....hey, what's just east of here?"

As I've noted in prior posts, series creators Ed James and Seaman Jacobs envisioned a more cynical F TROOP than what ultimately emerged once Hy Averback won the post-William T. Orr era power struggle on the set.  Reunion for O'Rourke was as close as we ever got to a heartwarming outing from the James/Jacobs team, and you can forget about a sappy conclusion like those found in A Gift From the Chief or Will the Real Captain Try to Stand Up here.  

"Sarge, if you ruin this night--I'll kill ya!"

Agarn temporarily putting his greed aside is an eyebrow raiser but makes sense here, as the opportunity for the second banana to run the show is the one thing almost as appealing as money to the frustrated subordinate.  Softie underneath he may be, but the empowered Corporal really gives that hat a workout and even goes after O'Rourke with a hat rack(!) when the guest of honor refuses all efforts to lure him out for the surprise.  He even rubs off on his underlings, as Duffy gives Vanderbilt a whack with his (likely decades-old) head covering.

The James/Jacobs attitude (also likely director Rondeau's) towards any F TROOP mawkishness is in evidence throughout O'Rourke's big night as every single attempt at hugs or tears is thwarted.  Often violently.  His old schoolteacher confirms that kid brother Morton was "the good kid" in the family and still holds a decades-old grudge over a frog in her teapot.  Old girlfriend Wilma McGee still has her figure despite gaining eight children (the Sarge's reaction is one of the best laughs in an episode stuffed with good ones) and her own thriving Emporium (now this interests Morgan) from the husband she married "while she was waiting" for O'Rourke to come home.  Two old buddies from the Mexican-American War have ended up on very divergent paths, to the peril of all party attendees--Mike O'Hanlon's shows us O'Rourke could be doing far worse things than his Enterprises.

"Where the Hekawi?"

Despite it's title and the numerous welcome tidbits from the Sarge's past, Reunion for O'Rourke is almost certainly best-remembered for the backstory provided for his business partners.  Yes, this is the episode that reveals just how the Hekawi tribe was named.  I won't reproduce the entire story; I couldn't tell it nearly as well as Frank deKova's Wild Eagle does anyway.  Suffice to say it is a legendary moment among F TROOP aficionados that lives up to the hype. 

Not long after his 2,038 performance run touring the country as THE MUSIC MAN, Forrest Tucker sings Dear Old Donegal.  Or, I should say, finally gets in more than a line or two at the fadeout of Act Two.  My Wild Irish Rose however is mostly ceded to the Hekawi Glee Club(!).  At least until the coda.  Par for the course for F TROOP, both are sung decades before they were actually written.

Once more, the co-creators allow O'Rourke to succeed where Bilko often failed, as the Enterprises finds that much-needed buyer in the Sarge's romantic past.  No, he and Agarn will never get rich either, but they'll surreptitiously keep ill-gotten gains almost every episode.  At least until the J.J.'s (and Rondeau) were completely out of the picture in Season Two.  Too bad.

Look out for LOVE THAT BOB's Mrs. Niemeyer (Bob Gives S.R.O. Performance), Marjorie Bennett as the Sarge's still-angry third grade teacher, and for MAVERICK's James Arness impressionist extraordinaire Ben Gage (Gun-Shy) as the Sarge's shady old pal O'Hanlon aka The Canary Kid.  O'Hanlon demonstrates the pitfalls of sentimentality in this universe better than anyone--if he could have forgone going to see his old friend, the Kid would still be at large and the most successful outlaw in the West at episode's end, right? 

HOW'S BUSINESS AT O'ROURKE ENTERPRISES?

Way too slow at the outset, but a timely sale to the McGee Emporium gets the souvenirs moving again by the epilogue.  Ever the shrewd negotiator, O'Rourke manages to make that sale without becomin' that father to eight blessed McGee young 'uns.

TIME PASSAGES:

O'Rourke states he "joined up for the Mexican War" and since it has been 25 years, this episode likely takes place circa 1871.  O'Hanlon's statement that Morgan was a Sergeant 22 years ago (and 3 years after that enlistment) is contradicted in Our Brave in F Troop later: "it took me ten years to get these stripes!"   In the coda, we learn that Chief Wild Eagle has been leading his tribe for 17 years.  Hey, close enough for that golden sundial. 

NUMBER OF TIMES O'ROURKE COULD HAVE BEEN TRIED FOR TREASON:

Zero, with everyone putting any differences aside for one night to celebrate the Sarge's silver jubilee.

PC, OR NOT PC?

Natives and palefaces come together in peaceful harmony to pay tribute to the Sarge, and the Irish cultural appropriation by the Hekawis is received well by the patrons sans O'Rourke.  The festive occasion even has by-the-book Parmenter cutting through red tape to let the Natives into the saloon, with the dangers of letting them near whisky going unmentioned. 

THE ALL-IMPORTANT NIELSENS:

Reunion for O'Rourke scored well with viewers with a solid 21.4 rating and 31.6 share, both above the season average of 20.4/31.3.  RED SKELTON led the 8 PM pack as usual with a 28.4/41.9 for the half-hour but the Troopers bludgeoned NBC's movie September Affair (15.7/26.3).

THE BOTTOM LINE:

Nice bit of symmetry for the show to celebrate O'Rourke's 25th year in the Army with its 25th episode.  Reunion for O'Rourke demonstrates the show in full stride on all fronts; just a tad of unintrusive heart and chock full of laughs.  I originally gave this the top rating and an extra half star for the classic Hekawi history story, and while I'm taking that half-star back in my revisionist rating, it's still a very worthy entry in a very worthy season.  (***1/2 out of four) 

F TROOP is currently seen weekday mornings starting at 9 A.M. Central Time on Outlaw TV.

F TROOP in the Nielsen Ratings Part Four - What REALLY Was, and Wasn't--and What Might Have Been

And now the thrilling conclusion of the F TROOP in the Nielsen Ratings series.  For you latecomers to the party, first, a chance to catch up: 

F TROOP in the Nielsen Ratings PART ONE at this link

F TROOP in the Nielsen Ratings PART TWO at this link

F TROOP in the Nielsen Ratings PART THREE at this link

I'm providing more context to the findings on the 1966-67 television season (see Part Two above for more), the show's second and unfortunately last.  We can dig into (and debunk) myths that had a half century to gain traction thanks to the newfound availability of Nielsen pocketbooks courtesy of Ratings Ryan.  Long-held perception and ratings reality have been proven to be two very different things throughout this exercise.  Thanks for checking out my ramblings over your morning coffee--I sincerely hope I've made it worth your while.  

F TROOP improved ABC's fortunes in its time slot again in 1966-67.

After BATMAN and GIDGET replaced SHINDIG! and DONNA REED for the second half of 1965-66 to kick off ABC's Thursday lineup, GIDGET averaged a rating of 18.6 for 14 airings (260.2 total) and a 29.2 share following BATMAN from January 12 to April 14, 1966.  Decent numbers on the surface, but losing over one-third of BATMAN's audience (27.0 rating/43 share).   When F TROOP moved into the time slot that fall, it improved on both GIDGET numbers during the season's first half (18.8/30.7)  despite a lead-in from a weaker BATMAN which fell to 19.3/33 during that September-December 1966 span (losing 28 percent of its rating and 23 percent of its share from its first season) and starting the season with one of the weakest lead-outs ever (more below).

GIDGET averaged 10.0 million households in the Spring of 1966, F TROOP bumped that up to 10.6 million households the following season.  This despite BATMAN dipping from 14.5 million households to 10.7 million in front of it.  F TROOP increased GIDGET's rating by 3 percent, share by 7 percent, and was seen in 6 percent more households. 

F TROOP did lose some of the audience from its lead-in--temporarily:

Over the course of the entire season, F TROOP lost 156,000 households on average from BATMAN:

F TROOP 10.615 million HH 19.24

BATMAN 10.771 million HH 19.53

For the full season, BATMAN rated 19.5, F TROOP 19.2: losing 1.5 percent of BATMAN's rating.  BATMAN had the higher rating of the two every week but two during the season's first half; the two shows tied once at 18.5 and F TROOP had a higher rating on 11/17/66.  Over the entire period from September 1966 through the end of December, ABC went from losing 32 percent of BATMAN's audience to less than 3 percent at 8 P.M. with F TROOP taking over for GIDGET.  Still, a loss is a loss.

Then, starting in January 1967, ABC gained households at 8 PM E.T.

In the second half of the season F TROOP was actually stronger than its lead-in.  Beginning 1/5/67, F TROOP had a higher rating than BATMAN nine out of the 15 weeks, with the two shows tying once.   BATMAN improved to 20.2 (302.8 over the 15 weeks) over the second half, F TROOP to 20.3 as noted in Part Two; if we remove reruns, F TROOP still holds a 7-5-1 edge in the 13 weeks in which both aired original episodes.  For the season, BATMAN held a 18-10-2 edge against its lead-in, but this was due solely to the first half.  During the season's second half, F TROOP (11.2 million households) actually averaged 60,000 more households than BATMAN (11.14 million).  Both shows improved from the first half of 1966-67, but F TROOP improved more. 

F TROOP's lead-outs might have had an affect on it at first.  

Moving to a new night and time was what I previously cited as a reason for F TROOP's somewhat slow start in Season 2, but another factor might have been one of television's all-time greatest disasters: THE TAMMY GRIMES SHOW (gone by October!) at 8:30 P.M.  With TAMMY GRIMES following it, F TROOP averaged 17.7 for the 3 weeks in September.  This improved to a 18.8 once DATING GAME was installed for GRIMES.  F TROOP surged to a 20.3 rating from January to April once BEWITCHED was moved up to 8:30 PM Eastern.  So BEWITCHED was very good for F TROOP, as you'd expect.  But the reverse is also true.

F TROOP and BEWITCHED were actually good for each other.

ABC made Thursday ladies' night beginning in 1967-68, moving Sally Field back to the 8 PM Thursday slot and adding Yvonne Craig to the cast of BATMAN as Batgirl.  But teaming F TROOP and BEWITCHED meant that ABC's two highest rated sitcoms in the Nielsens for both 1965-66 and 1966-67 were airing back to back on Thursdays, and F TROOP's second half increase of 1.5 ratings points was certainly helped by this schedule change.  Now, get a load of what having F TROOP as a lead-in did for BEWITCHED:

348.6 total in 16 weeks with TAMMY GRIMES/DATING GAME preceding it (21.8). 

346.4 total in 14 weeks with F TROOP as a lead-in (24.7)

ABC gave an early green light to THE FLYING NUN for the Thursday 8 PM slot in the Winter of 1967, so F TROOP would have been moved to another night had it returned.  Going by the ratings (not the only consideration for networks, obviously), that decision was debatable.  THE FLYING NUN briefly improved on F TROOP's showing (see more on that below) but BEWITCHED dropped from a 24.7 rating over the second half of 1966-67 with F TROOP as a lead-in to a 23.5 rating with NUN preceding it in 1967-68.  

THE FLYING NUN did--again, temporarily--improve upon F TROOP's showing on Thursdays.

THE FLYING NUN appeared to be a hit and an improvement, after taking over for F TROOP.  The sneak preview on September 7 averaged a 23.0 rating, which was higher than all but two F TROOP episodes the prior season.  In addition, NUN lasted three seasons after taking over at 8 P.M. Thursdays and finished 1967-68 in 34th place, up 5 spots from F TROOP while DANIEL BOONE slipped from 27th (remember, I came up with 20.5, not 20.8 for 1966-67) to 29th (20.0, though I came up with 19.8--a total of 514 in 26 airings).  So on the surface this decision bore fruit, since BOONE fell 3 percent and NUN gained a little less than 2 percent on the full season F TROOP numbers during 1967-68 as a whole.

Sources elsewhere gave NUN a 19.5 rating, but I came up with 19.7 rounding up.  THE FLYING NUN had a higher high share-wise during the first half, but after Christmas came a lower low than F TROOP had in either half of the previous season (30.7 and 31.8 respectively), finishing below a 30 share for the second half.

First, the season as a whole for each:

1966-67 F TROOP 19.24 rating/31.3 share (39th) 10.61 million HH

1967-68 FLYING NUN 19.66 rating/31.9 share (34th) 11.02 million HH

THE FLYING NUN also had the handicap of a weaker lead-in, as BATMAN utterly collapsed in front of it in 1967-68, totaling 246.1 for the season's first 16 weeks for a 15.4 average rating, losing nearly a quarter of its second half (20.2) audience from the previous season.  

So why do I say the improvement was temporary?  Because THE FLYING NUN was, like F TROOP a season earlier, a tale of two halves.  Only this time, the inverse of F TROOP's showing:

First half of 1967-68: 303.9 rating in 15 shows (20.2) 504.9 total share (33.7).

Second half of 1967-68: 246.8 in 13 shows (19.0) 387.7 total share (29.8).

NUN did have 10 weekly wins over BOONE to F TROOP's 9, but only one of those wins for FLYING NUN came after Dec. 14th.   By contrast, F TROOP won the entire 7:30-8:30 hour for the final month of the previous season. 

Taking each entire season into account, THE FLYING NUN did slightly improve the ratings and cut into BOONE's audience--thanks to the first half.  It is debatable whether ABC was well served in the long run by the switch.  By the 1967-68 season's end, the number of households tuning into NUN (10.75 million) was 450,000 below F TROOP's second half average for 1966-67.  BEWITCHED also performed better with F TROOP in front of it (24.7) than in either half of the following season (23.6 and 23.4 respectively) with NUN as a lead-in.   

While F TROOP had a similar dip to NUN in the second half of its first season (20.9 to 19.9 opposite RED SKELTON) it reversed this in season two, regaining all of its 1965-66 audience by the Spring of 1967.  In its second season, THE FLYING NUN continued declining, sliding to a 16.9 rating (456.9 in 27 shows, 9.8 million households) and well out of the top 50 (51st place KRAFT MUSIC HALL averaged a 18.0, that's as far as any ratings I could locate went) with 9.8 million households per week.  Perception of THE FLYING NUN's success was shaped by its first three months on the air--the next two and a half seasons demonstrated a fall arguably faster and farther than BATMAN's.  With the benefit of long-term hindsight it appears that THE FLYING NUN maintained positive momentum of the prior half-season from F TROOP (20.3 for the latter in early 1967 to 20.2 for the former in Fall 1967, not much difference) for only a few months and then the bloom fell off the rose.  

F TROOP versus its peers--was it really that disappointing in 1966-67?

Peers being the 1965-66 sitcom class that returned for 1966-67.

F TROOP went from 36th (20.4) to 39th (19.2);

HOGAN'S HEROES went from 9th (24.9) to 17th (21.8); 

GET SMART from 12th (24.5) to 22nd (21.0); 

I DREAM OF JEANNIE from 27th (21.8) to 41st (19.0); 

GREEN ACRES 11th (24.6) to 6th (24.6), the only one to move up in the rankings in Season 2, but the rating was identical to the year before.

GREEN ACRES as noted stayed the same, F TROOP's rating dropped 6 percent over the entire season (second half was less than 1 percent below its 1965-66 rating), HOGAN'S HEROES 11 percent, GET SMART 14 percent, JEANNIE 13 percent. In that context, F TROOP seems less disappointing in its second season than perceived, since all of its peers sans one fell further from season one to season two.

What might have been:

Since the 8 P.M. Thursday slot was promised to THE FLYING NUN long before schedules were announced, the most likely landing spot for F TROOP in Fall 1967 would have been in the 7:30 to 8:30 hour on Wednesdays, opposite LOST IN SPACE and THE VIRGINIAN.  It's hard to see F TROOP failing to improve on CUSTER, which was off the air before January 1968 with an anemic 11.7 rating.  As for the competition, well, F TROOP did post a higher rating than LOST IN SPACE in the first and second seasons for each:

1965-66: F TROOP 20.4, LOST IN SPACE 20.3

1966-67: F TROOP 19.2, LOST IN SPACE 18.8

Just sayin'.

With Ben Kalmenson holding the cards at Warner Brothers, and the Seven Arts sale announced in November 1966, it is likely that F TROOP was a goner no matter how high the ratings. For sure, though, ABC was too quick to deem it a disappointment in its new timeslot when THE FLYING NUN was promised the 8 P.M. Thursday slot for the following Fall by January.  (Why, exactly, when even the "disappointing" Fall 1966 F TROOP numbers improved on those for Sally Field's GIDGET the season before?  But I digress.)

F TROOP's second half performance helped give ABC ratings of 20.2, 20.3 and 24.7 for the 7:30 to 9 P.M. period on Thursdays over the season's second half, with all three shows benefitting.  One would think this would have solved the "Thursday problem" from the Fall, right?  We can only wonder what might have happened to it, and to BATMAN, if the fates would have allowed a return of all 3 that Fall unchanged.  Television history is full of what-ifs, and F TROOP suffered from poorer timing that most successful series.  We can all be thankful the fates allowed us the 65 episodes we have--imagine if the Seven Arts sale had gone through a year earlier.  Miracles do happen--HONDO eventually got rediscovered with only 17 episodes--but without critical syndication exposure afforded it by that second season in color, we might still be waiting for F TROOP to get its due.  There'd have been no five years on Nick at Nite, no three years on Me-TV, etc.

The closest comparison to F TROOP ratings-wise among its peers is I DREAM OF JEANNIE, which ranked 27th and 40th during the two seasons in which F TROOP ranked 36th and 39th.  The two shows were two tenths of a percentage point apart at the end of 1966-67, but JEANNIE had support from NBC and Screen Gems, and three more seasons of life in it, returning to the top 30 in its fourth season.  

How many more Emmy nominations would this man have received with two or three more seasons?

Hope you've enjoyed my ruminations on F TROOP and the Nielsens of the mid 1960s.  Now, back to reviewing it and all the other shows you've been enjoying episode guides for here at The Section.  I still reserve the right to return to the ratings in the future, so be warned!