Film Review: SHOWDOWN (1973)

 



Why the Hell isn't this on DVD yet? -- Number 67

SHOWDOWN (1973 Universal) Starring Dean Martin, Rock Hudson, Susan Clark, Donald Moffat, John McLiam, Ed Begley Jr., Charles Baca.  Directed by George Seaton.

It's the old chestnut that's been around far longer than Hollywood itself: childhood friends Martin and Hudson find themselves on opposite sides of the law as adults.  Masquerading as a lawman, Martin leads his gang through a successful train robbery.  He is forced to thin the ranks by one in self-defense afterward and subsequently takes off with all the loot.  The real sheriff is Hudson, Martin's lifelong best pallie, and D.A. McLiam fears that Hudson will let friendship get in the way of duty.  It's up to Hudson to capture Dino and keep him alive for a fair trial.  The latter isn't an easy task, as he'll have to get to him ahead of the surviving members of Martin's entourage (led by Moffat) AND keep the bloodthirsty McLiam at bay.

Frequent flashbacks flesh out the lifelong bond between the two friends and their friendly rivalry for Clark, who ultimately chose safe bet Hudson, but wonders about the road not taken.  She also worries about her husband, who can't match Martin's draw or marksmanship.  In short, there's next to nothing in SHOWDOWN that you haven't seen dozens of times, and screenwriter Taylor even acknowledges the lack of freshness by having Clark reference Damon and Pytheus halfway through.

Taylor doesn't give him the greatest one-liners, but Martin still displays his usual effortless charm without being cloying.  He even gets things off to a jovial start with a Jimmy Stewart impression while in disguise on the train.  Like his SHOWDOWN character, Martin's personal life was going through a rough patch during production: the accidental death of his long-time horse "Tops" and the aftermath of his 1972 divorce being the contributing factors.  With actor and character facing midlife crises, lines like "nothin's gone right since I left here" carry extra resonance.

Since Martin has the showier role by far, Hudson is mostly required to be sturdy and bland.  He's nevertheless solid and avoids being completely overshadowed, getting in some great moments of his own when concocting a story to potentially help Dino post-capture and silently reminiscing about their friendship. 

Filmed entirely on location in New Mexico, SHOWDOWN was the final western for both stars and director Seaton's cinematic swan song.  There's few surprises (if any) in the script and the teaming of Martin and Hudson isn't the big event it would have been a decade earlier.  Still, contrary to what some have written elsewhere, no one involved is mailing this one in--not even Dino.  Easy to forget afterwards, SHOWDOWN is also easy to watch and sufficiently entertaining with a number of poignant moments.

So.....why isn't this on DVD yet?

The film is more derivative than most.  While Martin and Hudson were boob tube A-listers in '73, both had reached the end of the trail as box office attractions, leading to SHOWDOWN's disappointing receipts and ensuing low profile over the years.  Within a year, Dino would even become a part timer on television.  Hudson wouldn't star in another feature until 1976's EMBRYO.

Why it should be on DVD:

Dino's appeal is timeless.  Virtually any Martin vehicle is going to have a built-in audience, and this is the one time that he and Hudson co-starred.   By 1973, he had little left to prove, so the highly motivated Dean Martin of RIO BRAVO and THE YOUNG LIONS was long gone.  Still, biographer William Schoell (MARTINI MAN) opines that SHOWDOWN is one of Martin's best later features. IMO it is definitely a much better western than SOMETHING BIG (1971) would have been for Dino's finale in the genre.

Dino with Tops (R.I.P.) in the last western for both

Missing No Longer: PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW (1971)

Man, the folks at Warner Archive have really outdone themselves lately.  Hot on the heels of their long-awaited release of CLEOPATRA JONES AND THE CASINO OF GOLD last month comes a Warner Brothers release that, if anything, folks have been clamoring even louder for over the years.

The truly bizarre, hilariously dark Gene Roddenberry/Roger Vadim collaboration (!) PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW has finally made it to DVD via the Warner Archive!  Reviewed here originally as Number 7 in our series, this 1971 film was way ahead of its time.  Actually, it may still be.

But here it is, with Angie Dickinson as a MILF 28 years before AMERICAN PIE gave us the term, Rock Hudson as the most progressive guidance counselor you'll ever see, the late John David Carson (who passed away just last year) as Coach Hudson's pet project, and a dazzling array of gorgeous Pretty Maids: Aimee Eccles, Margaret Markov (BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA), Brenda Sykes (MANDINGO), June Fairchild (the immortal Ajax Lady from UP IN SMOKE) and Joy Bang (NIGHT OF THE COBRA WOMAN).  

Roddy McDowall (LORD LOVE A DUCK) is on hand to remind us that the school has a lot of great little cheerleaders, while Telly Savalas works around the clock to locate the killer.

Highly recommended here at The Horn Section, there's also a limited number of collectible copies out there autographed by Angie Dickinson that are sure to be fetching high prices on ebay in the coming years.

No, I haven't forgotten, I've just had a full plate lately.  Number 47 is next post!

Film Review: PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW (1971)

"Why the hell isn't this on DVD yet?" -- Number 7





PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW (1971 MGM) Starring Rock Hudson, Telly Savalas, Angie Dickinson, John David Carson, Roddy McDowall, Keenan Wynn, James Doohan and Brenda Sykes. Screenplay by Gene Roddenberry from Francis Pollini's novel. Directed by Roger Vadim.

Numerous high school students having sex with their teachers and guidance counselors. A new release, ripped from today's headlines? No, it’s this uneven but wickedly funny black comedy from 1971 served up by the director of BARBARELLA and the writer/creator of.....STAR TREK?

A “terrific little cheerleader” is found scantily clad and murdered in the boys’ restroom with a note attached to her panties that reads: “so long, Honey”. Future KOJAK Telly Savalas (using cigarettes and shades as his props instead of lollipops) investigates the murder, and while he initially finds a shortage of suspects, he finds no shortage of giggling, miniskirted high school girls who find it unusual if they aren’t propositioned constantly.

Very progressive guidance counselor/football coach Rock Hudson sees nothing wrong with a counselor or teacher “sexually guiding” a gifted student. Hudson obviously thinks that there are several exceptionally gifted female students….and more of them turn up dead on campus, also with notes attached. Uh oh….we have a serial killer on our hands! This could affect the team’s morale for Friday’s big game!

Meanwhile, Hudson counsels traumatized team trainer John David Carson, who discovered the body in the restroom, but seems more troubled by the boy's reports of constant erections and his inability to lose his virginity. Hudson decides that literature teacher Angie Dickinson (looking incredible at 40) is just the one to help the boy.

"If it feels good, do it" is taken to its wildest extreme here....or is this the inevitable outcome when idealism collides with pragmatism? The perpetually horny Hudson has a loving family at home, including extremely loyal wife Barbara Leigh, yet still sleeps with female students daily. But, he IS married, so what’s a husband and father to do when a young, impressionable teenage girl starts wanting more than just sex? Hudson's an intellectual aspiring author who rejects accepted societal norms, but his message to the students isn’t always unconventional and pacifist. After all, he's also the wildly successful football coach, and he realizes that is the primary reason he is beloved.

Director Vadim spends a lot of time zooming in on breasts and buttocks, and this film would make a great double bill with 1966’s also-dark and similarly leering LORD LOVE A DUCK (directed by George Axelrod) in which McDowall, then 37, played a high school student; here, just 5 years later, he’s the clueless principal.

 

PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW falters during the final third, when the situation gets more and more implausible, but Vadim and Rodenberry commendably keep the tone jet-black all the way to the closing credits, when we hear the cheery theme song by the Osmonds(!).

Of historical interest, the film was ahead of its time in its use of thriller and teen comedy conventions that would become ubiquitous in the 1980's: promiscuous teenage girls end up murdered (i.e. Jason/Freddy) and an awkward high school guy tries desperately to lose his virginity with the help of a beautiful older woman (i.e. MY TUTOR, PRIVATE LESSONS).

So…why isn’t this film on DVD?

Bombed during its initial release. Hudson’s box-office pull was pretty much gone by 1971, and, as they say, satire closes on Saturday night.

Uncomfortable to some when considering that a new student-teacher affair pops up almost every other week these days on CNN.

As noted above, loses steam before the end as things get harder to swallow. And there is one nagging question that will occur to you: where the hell are all the parents?

Why it should be on DVD:

A must-see if you have a warped sense of humor. If not, it will still be interesting at least, given the performers, the writer, the director and today’s aforementioned news stories. One of a kind!

A chance to see Dickinson, Hudson and Savalas shortly before all 3 would start their wildly successful network TV series (POLICE WOMAN, McMILLAN AND WIFE, KOJAK respectively) and a chance to see James “Scotty” Doohan outside the Enterprise.

The legendary Joy Bang (NIGHT OF THE COBRA WOMAN) is among the Pretty Maids!

Aren't there plenty of STAR TREK fans out there who would be curious about Roddenberry’s lone feature film screenplay? And one that is 180 degrees away from TREK, at that?

Angie Dickinson has an extended semi-nude scene. Who didn't want her as a teacher?

If you’d like to see this one for yourself: in a rare TV showing, TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES will have it on at 3 A.M. (Central) on Sunday, August 13th.